Arguments With Sirius & Severus
by Insight Sisters
Summary: Join Sirius Black & Severus Snape on their many different disagreements. Ranging from the first one in their early childhoods to the very last, before Sirius's death.
1. The Very First

**Arguments with Sirius & Snape**

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Chapter 1: The Very First

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**Disclaimer: **I can only wish I owned Sirius… but I don't. I don't own Snape either, or any of the other families etc. Not even the plot; I'm _sharing_ that!****

A/N: Welcome to the first chapter of the brilliant story, shared by me & Dru. Yeah, it's Annie. Next chapter will be written by Dru, then me again, etc. Anyway, enjoy!

**UPDATE:** 20/7/04 [or 7/20/01 for Americans]. Chapter 1 replaced, small changes made. Nothing majoor, though.

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"Come ON, Sirius!" Sirius Black's mother snapped, flinging him a pair of elegant dress robes. Mrs. Black was trying to organize her older son for the Annual Black Party.

"Do I have to go?" whined a 7 year old Sirius. "Those parties are _stupid_!"

"Watch your mouth boy, or else…" began Aunt Cassiopeia, who had just dropped in. The part in question was in fact being hosted by Cassiopeia. All the important Pureblood families would be there; the Malfoys, the Lestranges, the Notts and plenty more.

"Now hurry up, we're going to be late! Why can't you be more like Regulus? He's ready!" Sirius's mother snapped, referring to Sirius's younger brother, Regulus. Regulus looked a lot like Sirius; the same black hair, grey eyes, tanned skin and facial features. But undoubtedly, there was something a bit more _evil_ about the younger Black. And of course, he was already dressed in his robes of pure black.

"That little brat stole my wand!" Sirius screeched while Regulus smirked evilly. Most kids got their wands at 11, just before school, but Sirius's mother insisted he have one from the tender age of 5. Regulus was due to get his soon, too, but until then he was quite content with stealing Sirius's. Sirius tried to pounce on Regulus, but his mother stopped him.

"Regulus, give Sirius his wand. Sirius, HURRY UP!" she yelled, walking out of the room impatiently. Regulus scowled and reluctantly returned the wand to Sirius. Sirius sighed and put on the stupid black robes and went to find the bitter, old hag that he was forced to call Mother.

"I'm ready, Mother," he said dully. She glared at him, running her eyes up and down to make sure his robes were perfect.

"Good, they'll be here any sec-" but Mrs. Black didn't finish her sentence. A knock on the door was her cause of interruptions. About half an hour later, number 12, Grimmauld Place was packed with Pureblood families, listening to stupid music, sipping wine elegantly or eating, just as elegantly and talking about boring adult stuff.

"Sirius, go play with some of the kids; Regulus is with the Nott and Avery boys. Yes, take little Snape with you," Aunt Cassiopeia told him. "Narcissa is talking with that Lucius Malfoy and Bella is with the Lestranges," she pulled the 'little Snape' towards him. Sirius looked at him with great dislike; he was a skinny, pallid boy with the greasiest back hair Sirius had ever seen.

"Sirius Black," he said coolly, looking around with boredom and eyeing Sirius with the same distaste Sirius showed.

"Snape? What kind of name is _that_?" Sirius asked incredulously. This was not Sirius's scene; talking to a slime ball of a boy just did not qualify as fun for Sirius.

"It's not my real name, you idiot! My name is Severus," he answered angrily, glaring at Sirius. But, wait, this could turn out well…

"Severus? That's even worse!" Sirius told him. _Stupid parties,_ he thought. _Stupid Purebloods, stupid house, stupid Snape!_

"Listen Black, this isn't my choice; being around you is not what I like to do for fun," Severus answered coldly.

"Yeah, well this party's stupid anyway!" Sirius yelled back. "You think I want to be stuck here, talking to a kid whose hair is practically _dripping_ with grease?" Sirius shoved his hand into his pocket, grabbing his wand. When he looked up, Severus already had his out, pointing at his head.

"I wouldn't, Black," he advised in a low, silky voice. "I can beat you any day."

"I could beat you with my eyes closed," Sirius told him confidently. Mother had already taught him a few easy hexes in preparation for a life of Dark Arts.

"I wouldn't be so sure, Black. At least I can walk into a room without my large head getting stuck in the door," he answered; his family was also a great Dark Arts supporting bunch and no doubt, he had gotten similar training to that of Sirius.

"SIRIUS BLACK, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" Mother had spotted them. "What do you think you are doing, boy?" she demanded, glaring at him. She looked over at Snape and gave a sickly smile. "I'm sorry, Severus, dear. Sirius, go to your room and don't come out!"

"FINE, I'LL GO! I don't even want to be at this stupid party and I DON'T want to be near Snivellus, here!" he yelled, quite pleased with himself. He was going to get away from his mother, the freakish Snape, now officially known as Snivellus and all he had to do was take out his wand. Not bad.

"What did you just call me?" Snape asked dangerously.

"SNIVELLUS!" Sirius yelled out. Snape launched forward, trying to get in a punch, but Mrs. Black, unfortunately, stopped him. "Oh, go wash your hair, Snivellus," Sirius added for extra effect, turning around to go to his room.

"I'm warning you, Sirius!" Mrs. Black yelled. But Sirius ignored her, the disapproving stares he was getting from adults and looks of awe from some of the kids. He also completely ignored Snape's sinister gaze and mutterings.

"I'll get that… _Black_, if it's the last thing I do,"

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Thank you, thank you! Yes, that was the first chapter, written by Annie (anniePADFOOT). Yes, I'm aware that I'll probably favour Sirius, just like Drusilla will favour Snape. But that way, you get both sides and each one winning some arguments. Anyway, I'll try not to be too mean to Snape ;) REVIEW!

xxoo annie


	2. Chapter Two

Hey.  
  
It's Professor Drusilla W.L. Silvers, and here's my chapter, at long last.  
  
Disclaimer- Nope, nada.  
  
666  
  
"Severus!" yelled a tall outline from the end of the hall. "GET THE HELL OVER HERE!"  
  
Severus looked up from his book, sighed warily, and walked over to his father. "What is it, sir?"  
  
"You've got an owl." he grumbled, holding up a tawny with a package in it's legs. "Didn't know you had friends."  
  
Severus practially growled a thank-you , took the parcel and owl, and went to his secluded room, his place of privacy. Of course, the privacy was due to his older brother's placing a couple locking charms on the doors, but that was unessecary information.  
  
As he tore open the package, an unpleasent aroma filled the room. "Oh, Merlin," Severus sweared.  
  
A letter fell out, and Severus, with seething rage, opened it.  
  
b Dear Snivellus,  
  
Happy Ugly Day. Here's some shampoo, as well. Might want to use it.  
  
No regards, Sirius Black /b  
  
There was, in fact, a bottle of shampoo. "Quite rude, really." muttered Severus. "Wonder if he'll get into Slytherin... He does have the guts."  
  
Swearing profusely, Severus plotted his revenge. Tying the Muggle gasses in a box, he calculated the outcome, and his potions were correct.  
  
Sirius Black would have a bomb.  
  
Literally.  
  
666  
  
I know that that was REALLY short, but be good readers and review either way. Next chapter of mine will be longer! 


	3. Third Time Lucky

**Arguments With Sirius & Snape**

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Chapter 3: Third Time Lucky

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**Disclaimer: **In ch. 1, I owned jack shit. It hasn't changed!

A/N: Well, there's an A/N at the end, but I just felt like putting one here too. For no absolute reason. Meh.

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After that little episode with the _bomb_ Snivellus had sent him, Sirius had not been happy. Never mid the fact that Sirius had in fact started it, sending him shampoo. But that was… well, that was for the sake of mankind. That bomb not only exploded, burning the inside of his room _and_ Sirius himself, but it let of a nasty gas that made you want to throw up. Sirius had gotten him in trouble with Mother yet again; Sirius was still sore. No doubt Snivelly would be getting more of those handy little shampoo bottles. _Perhaps next time I'll throw in some conditioner too,_ he thought, grinning wickedly. But Sirius had been waiting for a chance of _real_ revenge for ages. And of course, there was only so much you could do through letters. It's not like the saw each other at all. But today had turned out to be a fateful day for 10 year old Sirius, who was soon to start at Hogwarts.

"Sirius, you're meeting with Bella and her sisters at Diagon Alley. Cassiopeia offered to watch over you. Get going NOW!" a distant yell was heard. Sirius wasn't sure whether to be happy or sad. On one hand, he was going to be away from his mother… but Cassiopeia and her brats weren't much better. Except Andromeda. _Maybe shopping won't be so bad,_ Sirius thought; he was determined to stock up on something to help along with his revenge scheme for Snivellus.

"DIAGON ALLEY!" Sirius shouted clearly, stepping into the green flame that would transport him. Seconds later, he was falling out of another fire place.

"SIRIUS BLACK!" someone shrieked out. Aunt Cassiopeia was running towards him, her face red. _Great, _Sirius thought.

"Really, Aunt, I can take care of myself. Let me walk around alone," begged Sirius. His aunt didn't seem to be in a very good mood. Bellatrix was scowling, Andromeda was smirking and Narcissa looked simply bored.

"No, Sirius! Your mother told me not to leave you alone," she told him threateningly.

"I can walk with him, mum. Don't worry about it," Andromeda piped up. Her mother glared at her; no doubt from the 'mum' thing, which she despised. It was _Mother_. But Aunt Cassiopeia, after glaring, studied her oldest daughter before slowly nodding. Sirius smiled, as did Andromeda. She grabbed his hand and they walked off as fast as possible.

"So, young Sirius, where to? Money is provided," his cousin said, grinning happily. "School stuff first?"

"Nah, that's boring!" Sirius exclaimed; there was plenty of time for that later. He already had a few of his books, a wand, and general equipment; scales, telescope and that sort of thing.

"I know! Let's go to the Apothecary; you can get your things for Potions, but it has some other neat stuff," Andromeda decided. Sirius nodded in agreement, an idea already forming in his mind.

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"Listen; just do something to distract him, ok? I promise I won't do anything dangerous. It's all for fun," Sirius whispered desperately. To his delight, he had spotted none other than Snivellus in Madam Malkin's. Things couldn't get better. Andromeda shrugged, but agreed. Snape was trying on his new robes on the stool next to Sirius's and his other robes were discarded on the floor.

"HELP!" Andromeda was out the front, making a fuss. That wasn't her voice, but no doubt someone was yelling _because_ of her. It had the desired effect, for Snape turned around to observe. That gave Sirius just enough time to slip in the dragon dung he had secretly brought at the Apothecary into Snape's robes. The old ones, on the floor, were now filled with the putrid substance on the inside pockets and other places Snape wouldn't notice. _Job well done, Sirius,_ he mentally congratulated himself as he sneaked back to his own stool.

"Do you know what happened?" he asked Madam Malkin innocently. She shrugged in response, bustling around her desk for a few seconds.

"No idea, love. Some poor girl had feinted out the front. She's alright now, of course," was the reply. A minute later, Sirius noticed Snape giving him an evil look as he walked out to the counter, holding new robes in his hand and wearing the old, dung contaminated ones.

"That's all," he said coolly to Madam Malkin. He shoved some gold in her hands and walked out. But not before Sirius made his snide remark.

"Is it just me, or does something smell _really_ bad in here, all of a sudden?"

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End Chapter 3

If you were expecting the bomb episode, with Sirius receiving Snape's bomb, sorry.

Regarding Ch. 1:

No idea how far apart Sirius & Regulus are. Chapter 1 didn't make it specific, but I guess they'd be about 2 years apart.

In the original, both Snape & Sirius were 6. That's been moved up to 7. People were saying they were a bit wordy for a young age. One year isn't much older, but I think it's an improvement. Anyway, both of them seemed intelligent & quick mouthed to me; something I think that would have developed at an early age.

Some thought that was a bit extreme for a fight of little kids; something like food fights would be more appropriate? I thought that their grudge would start of with something more severe than some food being thrown. Besides, food fight is planned for later.

And Kyra Invictus Black; I'm one to check facts, so… Sirius does **not** have BLUE eyes. Originally, I just picked black, because a colour hasn't been mentioned in the books, only _dark_ or _fathomless_. But JKR has confirmed that Sirius has GREY eyes… if you don't believe me; check out her personal site, 

Thanks loads to everyone who has reviewed so far… please keep reviewing!

**Sophianwin** **Anna Taure** **Weirder Sisters ** **Shehrazade ** **Badger182** **Serpentina Serena ** **smollfry** **Kyra Invictus Black** **Larna**** Mandrea**

xxoo anniePADFOOT


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